Fitter, happier, more productive
Apologies to those of you who've been checking back here fairly regularly for new posts. Truth of the matter is that, as suggested in my recent posts, i've been feeling (a) healthy and (b) bored enough to return to work. As a result, my blogging schedule has been disrupted by having to do silly, pointless things like ironing shirts...

Never fear, tho, for my barmy self remains intact, however much suppressed by having to live in the same everyday world as everyone else. I'm clever enough to do both, and long for the day when the outfit i can wear to work is not a crisply ironed shirt, but instead something designed by this guy.

The day will undoubtedly come...

Congratulation Mrs Badger, it's a goal!
Now that I'm no longer a freakin' loon, i can look forward to the footie tournament about to kick off in Portugal as much as the rest of you. Well, apart from the fact that i'm from the land of haggis and scotch eggs (thanks Dom!).

Good luck England! And all the other countries as well!

PS...
Thanks to all of my fri3nds and family for the help and support while i needed it. I didn't know how lucky i was until i needed some help.

So what was it all about...?
For the past six weeks, i've become a psychonaut, delving beneath the surface of everyday reality, trying to piece together the conspiracies and plots, to fathom a way for the human race to find its way out of the mess it's in, to find a way for myself to rejoin the rest of you in the everyday reality in which we are all, ultimately, obliged to live. Some of the questions i asked, it seems now, don't have any simple answers, nor is there a single truth which will bring all the others into the sharper focus required to find the solution.

Or so i thought, until today, when it hit me with a blinding flash. I'm not mad, i'm sane, completely, utterly sane. I've found the truth.

If you think you're prepared to face the truth, here it is. And I'm ready to join the rest of the human race once again.

Or am i just bored...? (Thanks Rob!)

So how are you...?
Me, i'm getting better, thanks for asking. I visited my Doctor (hi Dr Varma!) again this morning, and for the first time since my, ahem, "episode", raised the subject of how best to manage my return to work. He suggested we discuss it next time round instead, so i guess he thinks i'm still medically incapable of working.

Hasn't stopped me getting out and about though (and enough cracks about playing squash, you there at the back!)... Since my last post i've been careening off the bumpers and flashing lights of the pinball table that is London's rich cultural life. Saw Pixies at Brixton Academy (superb and life-affirming), The Black Rider at the Barbican (disappointingly self-indulgent and overlong), the Pain exhibition at the Science Museum (highly recommended for those of you with an interest in the relationship between religions and power structures), the Cy Twombly exhibition at the Serpentine (a waste of time) and The Mindscape of Alan Moore at the ICA.

This last was probably the most interesting, to me anyway. Horses for courses, as I've said to many of you over the last few weeks, and i recognise that the abstruse, apocalyptic ramblings of a comic book writer-cum-magician (not illusionist, note) might not be to everyone's taste, but it was right up my street. If you get a chance do go see, then you might get some kind of an insight into what i've been describing, to those of you who're interested, as my "psychotic delusion".

This might surprise some of you who've known me for a while, particularly those with whom i've had discussions about the nature of reality (more than i'd care to admit, i know!). But my "episode" has caused me to revisit a number of my own belief structures, and while i'm beginning to feel sufficiently well to contemplate a return to work, i think that it will take a while to shake off some of the thoughts which i've been experiencing for the last six weeks or so. Which is not to try to alarm you, merely to point out that if, six weeks ago, a very good fri3nd of mine (hi Nic!) had sent me this, i might have glanced at it and dismissed it like most of you will. But because (a) i have some time on my hands and (b) i'm a freakin' loon, i'll probably spend a bit of time today reading it and thinking about it.

To reassure you, i'm also reading (amongst about another 40 books!) John Gribbin's excellent "Science: A History", partly as research for a short story / novel i'm currently working on, about someone who experiences a paradigm-shattering psychotic vision which completely changes how everybody thinks about the universe. And i can only write this story if i have a good notion of what we all believe about the universe, and how we came to believe these things.

Hot day today, might do my reading in the park. My pale scottish skin will no doubt suffer as a result.

Make sure you get out for a while yourselves, and make sure you drink a lot of water. If you know me, you know i love and care about you, so look after yourself.

It's the end of the world as we know it, and i feel fine
Fascinating piece in The Guardian about the potential long-term geopolitical repercussions of the current oil crisis, and its relation to the war on terror.

Particularly interesting is the almost footnote-like tone of the last couple of paragraphs.

Listen to the colour of your dreams...
I've started keeping a dream diary, in part so that i have something with which to fill the time and entertain the doctor when my talking cure begins in a couple of weeks, in part for the purpose of aiding my memory, as dreams fall away from you faster than real experiences. If you don't mind, i might occasionally share some of my dreams with you (as long as they don't contain anything too offensive or personal, of course)

So last night in my dream i was playing an Xbox game with my brother (hi Pete!). It was one of those fighting games, you know, in which you pummel various buttons in an attempt to kick, punch, or jump over the head of your opponent. Except in this game the characters looked like pacman - i.e. small and round and flat - and they could only move in two dimensions, left and right, and up and down. The game was pretty uninspiring, and we were getting pretty bored. Then i realised that in addition to moving left and right and up and down, you could also move in another dimension. This was harder to see, because the game took place in a two-dimensional environment, but being able to move in this other dimension gave you a distinct advantage over your opponent.

Then, this being a dream, i decided that i wanted to go and visit another fri3nd of mine (hi Gigs!) who was having afternoon drinks with a couple of guys from a band that i like (hi Gene! hi Dean!). Unfortunately they were in the States, so normally it would have taken the best part of a day to get over there, and i would have missed the afternoon drinks. However because of my experience playing the game i realised that it was possible to move in another dimension. So i climbed out of the window, then down a very long, very broad, very deep staircase, for quite a while (say 10 minutes or so). Then at the bottom i jumped out of the staircase, and sat and had afternoon drinks with the guys and a very nice girl (hi dream girl!).

Then, because life carries on, i realised that i had to get back home. So i climbed on the escalator that takes you back to Britain (come on - this was a dream!). But when i got there, they wouldn't let me back in, because i'd travelled without a passport (you don't need a passport to travel in other dimensions, silly!). And because the escalator only travelled in one direction, i couldn't get back to the States. So i was stuck there, in limbo.

And then i woke up.

What a funny dream! And what a long post, my longest ever, i think! Sorry for taking you away from your work this long! Sorry to your boss too!

Uh oh...
I've started to receive a lot of spam emails to the Kicking a Stone email address (all penis enlargement, thanks for asking), and while it's manageable for the moment, i might have to think about another way to maintain my public presence if it gets much worse.

This morning, however, something altogether more sinister, an email from "abuse@gov.us" informing me that "You have visited illegal websites. I have a big list of the websites you surfed.".

It would be worrying but for the fact that it's obviously an automated and vaguely illiterate email, most likely from a script kiddie, which contained a virus that had already been stripped out by those nice folks at Blueyonder by the time it got to me.

Feel dead from the neck up this morning. Is this because (a) i had a skinful of wine and beer last night, (b) i've increased the dosage of my medication, (c) i think i might have upset a very good fri3nd or (d) something altogether more sinister...?

Answers to the usual address: but no viruses, please...

Oooh, it's all a bit grisly and hopeless...
... This weather's horrible, isn't it? Just went round the corner to get my beer for the footie later and got soaked. Weather changes mood, as a very wise man once said.

Never mind. It might be better by the weekend, in London at least. And by, say, the start of next week, the world should be a cheerier place again, eh?

Listen, do you want to know a secret...?
Pssst... I didn't really go to Switzerland in the end, after all. My doctor (hi Doctor Varma!) thought i wasn't well enough to travel, and as all the advice he's given me so far has been excellent, i didn't go. I was tickled by the irony of the fact that i'm not well enough to work or well enough to go on holiday, tho...!

So what have i been doing then? Laying low, pretending to be on holiday, seeing fri3nds and family, and generally living life. I'd recommend it to everyone!

But i guess that most of you are back to work now, so it feels like time to do some more work.

Hope you all enjoyed your bank holiday Monday. Me, i went for a walk to take pictures of anything i saw and thought was interesting. Like this, for example.

I walked around the City of London. I only really like to walk around it on bank holidays, when you can pretend that some kind of apocalypse has happened, cos there's no people, only buildings. Funny thing is, these days the police look really hard at you when you stop to take pictures. It's as if they're worried about something...

More later...

Oooh, my head hurts!
To London's fashionable Shoreditch last night for drinks with fri3nds (hi Paul! hi Luke!). And thence to a headache that dragged me out of bed this morning at an unfashionably early hour. You wouldn't think that i'm medically incapable of working.

He's a maniac, a maniac (EVERYBODY now!)...

Course, the reason i'm not able to sleep might be less to do with my hangover, and more something to do with this. Or this. Or even, if i'm feeling really batty, this!

Or it might be something completely unrelated to any of this. Or all of the above. Or none of it.

Off to Switzerland tomorrow for an atmosphere of neutrality and some Hans Castorp style convalesence. Which means that i'm getting better, doctor, or that i'm getting worse? You tell me, i just work here...!

A big dog ate my homework!
Good to know that the world is being run by a man who can nearly complete a whole bike ride!

Shame about the face, George!

So what's it all about then (Part II)...?
It's getting clearer and clearer to me every day. The universe looks, finally, as if it has a purpose, a sense of narrative.

I'm not mad, i'm sane. And i'm clearing out the cobwebs, clearing out my closet. I've found some things that i might be able to make into some other things, but for the moment, and if you have a moment, i can share them with you.

Peace & love. Have a great weekend.

C x

Let me take you down...
And then up, and then down again, and then back up. Clothes are not merely optional, but positively discouraged.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again. You cannot make this shit up!

Hefty post coming later for your Friday afternoons. You have been warned...

You can take the high road...
If you want to, that is...

Just returned from Scotland, from seeing my sister (hi Laura!), who i love more than life itself. We took a trip to the highlands, to Glencoe, with the aim of making a film about our journey.

This is not that film. This is just some pictures that i took, and a song that i like very much. Laura's making the actual film by herself. And, like everything she does, it will be touched by magic.

PS, Do you believe in magic?
'Cos i think that this might well be the closest thing to a miracle that we're likely to see in our lifetimes...

It's always better on holiday (still)...
I'm off on my travels, today, what fun!

Today begins the first part of a two week interrupted sojourn with my sisters (hi Laura! hi Susan!) who, along with the rest of my immediate family (hi Rita! hi Irvin! hi Pete!), are my very, very best fri3nds of all.

That of course goes without saying.

I'm taking my computer with me (and my notebooks, and my camera), and if i see anything worth sharing then it also goes without saying then i'll do my darndest to try and share it with you all.

Computers are great! When they work, that is. Which isn't all the time, alas. But they're easy to fix. Easier than people, anyway. But that shouldn't stop us trying to fix them both.

Whee, what a weekend i've had so far! What an interesting time it's been! Those of you i've met (hi fri3nds! you know who you are!) have an inkling of what an interesting time it's been.

But only one person (hi you!) knows quite how interesting it really has been.

See you on the other side.

Peace.

C x

God's a smoker...
... But do you really think that she is...? And if she is, what do you think it is that she smokes...?

Latest in a series of excellent, if slightly uncanny (and unnerving) contributions from Mary. Thanks Mary! I think!

Version 3.0
As if you hadn't already guessed (which you should have done, having been smart enough to find your way here, of all the other places which you might have gone to in the first place), things seem to be taking a turn for the stranger.

Busy today, meeting many fri3nds, obviously, too many to mention (but you all know who you are! hi fri3nds!).

Lest ye worry about my sanity, kiddos, fear not, for this is but art (or a nervous assay at a new version of the same). But if you want to reassure yourselves, you know how to find me...

We are not alone...!
Turns nervously and shivers at the sound of footsteps behind him... Only to find no-one there, as he expected (and mebbe, he doesn't know, also perhaps feared).

But what's this...?

Oh doctor, please help me, i'm damaged, EVERYBODY NOW (everybody joins in and links arms, high-kicking their way back to sanity in time-honoured busby b-b-b-bishop berkeley fashion...)...

Let me take you down...
Went to see some live comedy, last night. Not the usual stand-up, mind, but a concept i can rapidly see sweeping the nation: to whit, a live sketch show.

This was at the fantastic downstairs at the king's head, a venue i've enjoyed many times in the past, and will enjoy many times in the future, particularly now that my home is a mere few minutes stumble away from the pub, and they serve my very favourite kind of beer in about three different varieties on draught...!

The actual night was called Brian Luff's Sketch Show, and i laffed out loud more times than i care to mention. Treat yourself and go see if you can...

Join my club!
Sorry kids, i've changed my Blogger settings just enough so that only registered bloggers can post comments here from now on.

This is in part to avoid the possibility of flaming, though the comments I've received so far give no indication that this is a possibility, and that we're all fri3nds here. But it seems, having looked through the Blogger Comments FAQ that this is the only way you can identify yourself, and therefore avoid having to leave anonymous comments.

Being a registered Blogger is no bad thing, by the way. I've spoken to some of you about the joy it has brought me over the last couple of weeks, and setting up an account should be relatively pain-free.

Come on in - the water's lovely.

Blueyonder are great, but they're poo, too
Because my email is on, then it's off, then it's on again, and now it's off again.

And who has soooo much time that they can spend ALL their spare time on the phone to customer services people?!!!

Not even me, and I'm medically incapable of working. And I have another certificate, now, for even longer, to prove it!!!!

So I'm off to the pub! Hurrah!

No more posts today, you'll be relieved to hear!

One last post for just now, then i'll do something else for a while
My very good fri3nd Myat sent me this because she knows that i sometimes need a little bit of cheering up. Don't we all!

Thanks Myat (PS And, oh, happy birthday!).

Spot the difference
Those ever so nice people at Blogger have made their website look a bit nicer and have added some nice new things to the Blogger functionality.

As a result, you can now add comments to any of my posts. So now we all have another way to keep in touch! Hurrah!

PS, I've added a forum too, but it's hidden here until i can find the time to make it look like the rest of the site. But it works, perfectly fine, i think...

Just because you're paranoid, don't mean they're not after you...
Hi to all my fri3nds!

Technical problems at the Blueyonder end (hi Blueyonder!) mean that i'm currently unable to access any of my email addresses using any of the 3 methods i can usually use to do so.

So if you're not getting a reply to your mail, it's not cos i don't like you. I really do like you!

Just to show you how much i like you, here's a tip about how to get the most out of your day. And if you urgently need to get in touch with me, use my mobile number (sms or voice, i'm not fussy!)

Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain!
It's a few years since i've seen The Wizard of Oz, but to my recollection one of the most uncanny moments in the movie is when Dorothy and her companions are followed by walking trees who freeze every time the travellers turn to catch them.

Such things are common in this universe (or perhaps another?). In any case, my very good fri3nd Mary said that every time she stopped to look at these trees, they stopped, too.

No more posts today. I'm tired from lack of sleep and have yet more fri3nds (hi Ronan! hi Dom!) to meet today...

Dobra!
A very, very good fri3nd of mine (hi Hopkinov!) sent me about the most interesting example of spam i've ever seen. It's copied here for your interest and amusement. If anyone has received anything like this before, or knows anything about the likely origin, please let me know, usual address!

But here...
Out with a fri3nd last night (hi fri3nd! you know who you are!), and we were discussing, as so often i do these days, the possibility of another universe than this one.

But how do you get there...?

Do not unfasten your seatbelts!
A very good fri3nd of mine (hi Gigs!) asked me a question, earlier, about why it is so necessary, while on aeroplanes, to turn off electrical appliances during take-off and landing; and why it is so important to ensure that the window-shutters are pulled down at the same times...

It doesn't appear to be anything to do with the best practice advice for airplane safety... So is it just so that we can get more practice at doing exactly what we have been told to do...?

Or is it something even more sinister than that...?

Answers on a postcard, please, if you know...

Thunder and lightning, did yuz think i was dead?
Sorry there've been no posts for a couple of days, kids: but i've been celebrating my entry to the middle part of my life.

There'll be more, later, methinks. Time to get busy. Time for the whole thing to start all over again.

Watch this space.

Hi!
Nothing much particular to say today, busy doing housework then meeting a fri3nd (hi Nic!) for drinks later.

To those of you i met up with yesterday (hi fri3nds! You know who you are!), i'd just like to say, thanks for all the kind words, about the website and about all the other stuff. I'm taking it all to heart, have no fear!

And to those of you who said that you'd like to get more involved with the site, just wait a little while. There's some more admin i have to do, which i'll try to get done over the weekend. Then the error messages which some of you are seeing will (hopefully) go away, and there'll be a few more ways for all of our fri3nds to get more involved.

Peace, enjoy the sunshine, and have a great weekend. I'm going to to the dogs! And so are some of you!

C x

Ooh, i feel all tingly...
And i woke up soooo early this morning! Not like me at all!

The only thing that upsets me about being medically incapable of working is that there are some fri3nds i used to see everyday who i don't see everyday anymore (hi James! hi Mark! hi Mary! hi Myat! hi Stuart!). One of them has just come back from Paris, and all i got was this lousy video.

Except there's nothing lousy about it at all...! I miss you, kids ;)

Peace x

We're going to need a bigger database...
On the excellent Phill Jupitus breakfast show on BBC Radio 6 yesterday i heard about this online flattery tool which supposedly compares your features to their massive database of "200 photos of Top Stars" and tells you which you most resemble. Being bored, geeky, and in need of some reassurance (see my previous post), i decided to give it a try. Only to find that the Top Stars i most resemble are David Beckham, Richard Dreyfuss and Marky Mark...

Ahem.

Give it a try if you're bored. And if you're really bored, you can see my results online for approximately 48 hours from the date and time of this post.

So. What did you do today?
All working very hard no doubt...

I'm medically incapable of "working" (and have a certificate to prove it), so i went off to the pictures and saw that movie that I posted about last week. It was very good, but a bit difficult for me to watch, and therefore to take in properly. It reminded me of something i once heard William Gibson say about Blade Runner. He said he liked it, but it was so like the inside of his head that he had to walk out of the cinema half-way through.

I stayed to the end of this movie, but i missed lots of things in it because i was thinking about some other things which weren't in it. So i'll probably need to watch it again. Just as well it was a good film, eh...?

Afterwards, i went to a pub and had a pint of white beer, which is fast becoming my favourite type of beer. While i was drinking it, i read some interesting articles in New Scientist magazine, which is fast becoming my favourite magazine. People are so clever, you know, they're figgering out more and more things every day.

Quite a nice day, all in all. And there's still some of it left to come!

Or is there?

May the fourth be with you!
Poo, no sunshine today, by the looks of things.

Never mind, here's a picture i took yesterday to cheer you all up...

I'd like to teach the world to sing...
But first will we all need to speak the same language...?

Or have we found a way round this problem...? Not quite there yet, but it'll come, it'll come...

People are strange!
Because if we can do this, why do we feel the need to do this...?

So what did you do today?
Me, i went for a walk around parliament hill. Then i went to a pub, where i met some new fri3nds (hi new fri3nds! you know who you are! and if i tried to spell your names i'd get them wrong, so email me, then i'll be able to spell them next time i have to!). Then i met up with some old fri3nds and a few more new fri3nds! (hi Adie! hi Rob! hi Kate! hi Phoebe! hi Alfie!).

Gosh, i've had a busy day for someone who's supposed to be taking it easy...! But don't you just love the sunshine!

(PS: Those of you who've contacted me because you're worried about the way i'm spelling fri3nds, please do not adjust your sets. It's supposed to be spelt that way! There is nothing wrong with your computer. Well, nothing that manifests itself in that particular way. Even some adverts do strange things with typography, and although i don't understand what this means, the thing that i'm doing has something to do with a song by The Beatles. Clue: It's Come Together!)

(Oh, and PPS. Blessed are the geeks, for they shall inherit the earth... But if they're to do so, they'll need to be a little bit more organised than this. Sorry Adie...!)

Wake up.
Those of you who know me (and that's probably all of you, still) might know that i've been having problems sleeping. For a while.

Some recent changes in my life have meant that i am sleeping, now: but the funniest thing about it is that, guess what: i no longer dream. Not while i sleep, anyway.

I'm having some of the daftest notions, though, kids, i really am. I've spoken to some of you about them over the last couple of weeks, and we've laughed and thought our way through what some of those notions might actually mean.

What's so funny 'bout peace, love and understanding...?

So what is it all about, then...? Has anybody figgered it out yet...?

We all have stories (or songs, or funny little dances) inside us, you know. We all have beautiful things, just waiting to be born. Mostly we don't let them out, because we're worried that people will laff at us, or point at us, or stare and back away, waving their hands in front of them as they do.

Here's a story i wrote, a few years ago, about a fri3nd i don't see anymore. I guess it's long enough ago that it's okay to share, and no-one's going to be tewwwibly upset that i've posted it on the world-wide interweb.

If it's too soppy for you, you don't have to read it. That's the joy of the interweb. You can just click on something else, instead of having to stay with it for long enough for someone to try to tell you, or sell you, something you have no interest in.

Kids, i have a dream that we can change the world.

Who's in?

Lonely is an eyesore...
Those of you who're in your mid-thirties (and, let's face it, we all are) might remember the ethereal, other-worldy light cast on the walls of our caves of adolescence by the music of the Cocteau Twins, and the cover art of Vaughaun Oliver / 23 Envelope. Later came the angular neurosis of Throwing Muses, and the psychotic space age weirdness of Pixies. And another two hundred or so absolutely unique and insane bands, many of the members of whom shuffled onto This Mortal Coil.

Me, i always liked the Pale Saints, but i think that's a taste i never really managed to pass on to anyone else.

This trip down memory lane was occasioned by this history of 4AD, which i found out about while thumbing throught The Guardian's geek section. And blessed are the geeks, for they shall inherit the earth.

Enjoy the long weekend.

Hey man, slow down!
I won't post anything else today, 'cos i've got lots of nice things i want to do today, and i've got some of my very best fri3nds coming round for dinner tonight (hi fri3nds! you know who you are!).

I also want to give all of you who're sending me emails saying you're too busy to look at the website properly time to catch up!

If you only have time to follow one link, tho, this one is probably the best one to look at. It was sent to me this morning by another very good fri3nd (hi Bill!), and it sounds eerily like (gulp!) the truth!

Thanks for the link Bill. And don't forget (or let me forget) what we were talking about last night.

It's always better on holiday!
If for no other reason than that i can stay up late while most of you are already in bed! And read! And listen to music! And play on my xbox!

And fritter away time posting inconsequential nonsense on my website.

So yesterday (actually, the day before yesterday, now!), i was poodling up the road, coming back from the shop around the crescent where i go, these days, to buy some nice things to eat for my lunch. Yum!

And i saw some small children, with their mums, selling some things outside their front door.

Now, normally (those of you who know me will testify to this) i would have panicked and run away, saying (if i'd bothered to say anything at all), "Sorry kids, no time to stop, no time to talk! Too busy doing something!"

(What it is that i was so busy doing i can't even remember by now!)

But yesterday (or the day before yesterday, do you know, it doesn't really matter!) i decided to stop, and say hello, and look at the things they were selling.

And i said, do you know, this book is probably the only thing that i think a boy would like. And they sold it to me, and it was a fair deal!

Then i went home, and because it's always better on holiday, i looked through the book, then looked at the author's website. He's having some problems with his new book, he says there, because he's trying to draw the rain, and the rain is transparent, and moves very quickly.

I know how he feels.

(The heading for this post, btw, is a lyric from a song by a band that i like very much at the moment. You should already know about them, but if you don't, and you have the time, i recommend that you try to listen to their album)

Time for my kip.

Peace.

C x

Holy fuck
That's all i can say. Holy fuck. Look at this. Thanks to Tristero for the link, and more objectivity than i can muster....

Uh, what was i talking about again...?
Fascinating piece in The Guardian about... Errr... Oh look, some pretty blossoms.

Now, where were we...?

Oh, and this movie looks like it might be quite good... Some more stuff here.

Movies are great!

Entertainment for the masses.
Do you have a pet who has to stay at home all day on their own...?

I have a couple of fri3nds who do (hi Nina! hi Neil!), and one of them works at the Beeb.

I wonder if they had anything to do, then, with this ...?

Where's your head at?
What are they removing exactly? And where do they plan to store it?

Oooh, one last thing!
I saw Sean Hughes today! In Crouch End, which is a nice place to live.

And i know that people on the telly, or the radio, or who are known by more people than they actually know themselves (in general) are not always so keen to be approached by people they don't know themselves.

But i tapped him on the shoulder, and said:

"Sean Hughes! You're a funny guy! You've made me laugh! All my life!"

He said thanks, and began to walk on, smiling. Then i had another thought.

"And i loved your radio shows! You've got bang-on taste in music!"

He smiled a bit more. I reckon people aren't told that they do a good job, as often as they deserve to be told, at least. And it makes people happy to be told that.

Enjoy the sunshine. There's a lot of it ahead.

What was the question again?
So what's wrong with this picture?

Go on, you figger this one out...

Ooops!
A very go0d fri3nd of mine (hi Nix!) mailed me today to say that she liked the site, but was surprised that there weren't any pictures. There's an object lesson in usability that Jakob Nielsen amongst others would undoubtedly appreciate!

I've changed a couple of lines of code as a result, and hopefully the point of this whole thing will begin to seem a little clearer. And those of you canny enough to have actually spotted the hyperlinks (despite my best efforts!) will see one less error message, too.

My fri3nd has had to wear start wearing elasticated pants, which i guess she thinks is a shame because she has a very nice figure. It's all in a go0d cause, though, because in a few month's time there will be another go0d person in the world.

The more go0d people there are in the world, the less room there'll be for bad people. Another fri3nd (hi Jimmy B!) told me that. And his very best fri3nd (hi Charlotte!) is wearing elasticated pants too...

Here's some pictures of things I did today.

Awww crap!
Chelski look as if they're going to try to buy every player in the world! Poo.

Still, there are some things that money can't buy. Let them build their army of bench-warmers. We will still have our beautiful Arsenal.

And we should always remember that some things are more important than football.

Break on through to the other side...
Bush and his new american century people think that the path to the future is via the high frontier. Me, i think you need to look inside. But taking the right path requires a healthy dose of scepticism. And wonder. And humour.

Cheers for the link, Fraser.

Looks like an interesting exhibition... I might go to have a look at it, later this week, and i'll post more if i find out anything worth sharing.

Don't give up the day job
What, just during those hours...?

Something very special happened yesterday. A very wise man once said that football isn't a matter of life and death, it's much more important than that... He might have been on to something, there...

'Course, it's lucky that while Arsenal won the league, they did not defeat Tottenham, their "arch-rivals", on their own ground, at the same time. For all kinds of reasons.

Because football's not always that important...

Under (re)construction
Sorry, you might see some error messages while i'm building this darn thing properly. Wish they were as witty, or pertinent, as this

So what's it all about, then?
Goodness, i only wish i knew.

Here's a game to play while i try to figger it out...

My mother, who is an excellent counsellor, and an excellent human being, asked me to make a website for her, now that she is counselling full time. I want to make it look good, so it won't be ready until later this summer.

To show her how easy it would be, though, because she worries that i take on too much, i knocked this up for a laff during an afternoon otherwise spent having dinner at her place. I did it on my laptop, and she didn't even notice i was doing it, taking the pictures, optimizing them in photoshop, doing quick and dirty graphics and the lot.

Of course, when i tried to show it to her, she was out for the count, and i'll bet that this is the first time she'll see it. My brother saw it, though, and thought it was funny. So I thought it would be okay to share. Sorry ma..

The moral, of course, is that it's easy to do this kind of thing, these days. You can do it too.

Here's one i made earlier. A memory of a happy day, someone's birthday, i think... The kind of day that makes life worth living.

Light the blue touch paper and stand well clear...
Well it made me laugh, anyway...